In Loving Memory
Nicolas John Russell
February 15th 1991 ~ February 19th 2010
I was not fortunate enough to spend very much time with my brother Nicolas before he passed away in 2010, however I have wonderful memories of the time we did spend together and I have some wonerful pictures and ones that my dad has since given me. I also have some poems and other things that Nicolas wrote that are on this page to celebrate what was a short but incredibly meaningful life.
Love.
What is It?
Love is a fleeting instance of mutual being. Not feeling, but being, not awareness, but being.
Love is hope.
It is the desire and hope for these moments that drive humans on their most basic level, regardless of whether or not they realize it.
The fuel that drives the human soul, for once tasted, a person is bound to it.
No human is exempt from the desire for it, though many convince themselves they are.
Beauty
Beauty is perception,
Interpretation of frequencies of light,
Slamming into the rods and cones within the eye,
Racing to the brain to be encased in thought,
From light to opinion,
Formed by the personal judgments,
The prejudice of a man,
Unknown even to the conscious mind,
These define beauty,
Beauty which is perception.
Verify Existence
Verify existence,
Punch the wall until you feel the pain,
Jump up and see if you come down,
But if you feel and if you fall,
Does it really mean you exist at all?
The world around you,
The people you can see,
You perceive therefore you think,
Existence is proven thus,
But if the perception isn't real,
How do you prove existence?
Knowledge
Knowledge is more addicting than drink,
For knowledge is the substance of life,
The blood which flows through our veins,
Without it we would be nothing,
Mere husks upon the Earth,
Without it we would shrivel and die,
As surely as a plant would without water,
Throughout our human history,
The quest for knowledge,
Our saving grace,
Our sustenance,
The avenue open for escape,
Escape from apathy,
From all that society would have us believe,
All religion would have us accept as truth,
Religion is not our salvation,
Invented principles abused for power,
Ideals and morals not our own,
Force fed since birth,
Taught to observer and follow,
Like platonic cattle to the proverbial slaughter,
The slaughter of our individuality,
Why do we stand silent allowing our voices to go unheard,
Live not in religious ignorance,
That is all it is,
And the voice of a god,
What is that but the echo of our dreams?
Man
Peace enshrined the Earth,
A veil of stillness,
Nature in its course,
Symmetry in motion,
Balance at its best,
Disrupting the tranquility,
Destroying harmony,
Man came around the corner,
And then the world was doomed,
They fight and die,
Love and cry,
Then lie in the stone cold tomb.
Realization
At the beginning of this time,
Came the word and then the lie,
Broken in the face of reality,
Came crashing to a halt,
And the sacrifice,
Life for life,
Death the catalyst,
Ending the shame and strife,
Realization oh the pain of dying,
No more time now for crying,
All done dead is the sun,
Creation begins anew.
Life in a flower
The universe in motion
Creation expanding forever in motion
One standing still, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
Over the rainbow
Under the valley
Through the window
And down the dark alley
Life keeps on moving
Never behooving
No stop, all flow
Must go, can't delay
One standing silent, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
A flower in bloom
Lighting the gloom from within
Dark minds and deeds
Poor hearts that weep
Mourning for lives already gone
One standing still, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
The equation of life
Exploding atoms
Bits and pieces of stars and stratums
Of life we never will know
One standing silent, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
Dying suns and cold dead planets
Black holes obliterating matter
Novas and blasts
Darkness and laughs
All with a light shining through
One standing still, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
Stars being born and stars being torn
Dying too young
A fate not their own
Hopeless and dashed
Helplessly rash
Now in the stone cold tomb
One standing silent right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
One just observing
Rather unnerving
Silent and still as a stone
Cold to the touch
Iced to the bone
Standing mute
Forgotten by all but a few
Life in a flower
If only for an hour or two
George Bernard Shaw once said, "Lack of money is the root of all evil;" this proved very true for three high school students, Graig, Ike and Dick. These students attended Farce High School in Colombia, a small private institution which professed a high standard of education, but extracted a large monetary toll from its students. While it promised an excellent education, it often failed to deliver. In attempts to cut costs, Farce High School regularly hired teachers such as Mrs. Fuddlebum, a charming person who, coming from a technologically backwards rural area, was forced to pretend to teach due to the fact she was qualified for nothing else. Through contracts such as these, the "superior education" promised was deteriorated beyond repair, but I digress. This is the story of Graig, Ike and Dick, not the woes of Farce High School's short, bleak life.
"I need more money," said Graig looking woeful, "at this rate I'll never afford the MacBook Air." Ike stood silently in a badassical attitude that could not have been pulled-off better by anyone short of Tom Hanks.
Dick, looking thoughtful, proposed an idea, "We need a product to sell, but what?"
Their friend Boolean, who was at times a very moral person, but at others had fewer ethics than Tom Cruise in Collateral, put forth the thought that at that moment formed from the dark swirling mists of his mind. Speaking to Graig, he said, "You could always snitch some of the Gala items and sell them on E-bay." Dick, who never had many morals to begin with, was quick to second this suggestion. With Ike still standing silently looking on, Dick and Boolean managed to convince Graig of the value of this plan and the ease with which it could be pulled off. Even if caught, they would be protected by the pure badassedness of Ike's existence, argued Dick. Graig finally gave in and they set the date for that evening; with a plan ready, they departed to gather their tools.
The next day, Prince Valentino, who also happened to be the principal of Farce, discovered that over 83.241% of the items donated to the Gala, Farce High School's annual fund raising auction, had been removed. In retaliation, he changed the school dress code, making all students wear a full body length cover made of sackcloth at school. The lack of funds coming from the Gala caused a chain reaction of misfortune for Farce High School; teachers such as Mrs. Fuddlebum were laid off, tuition was raised and many students had to leave the school, including Graig, Ike, Dick and Boolean. Though they attended schools with better educational programs than Farce, they were not accepted to the colleges they applied to because the high schools from which they graduated were not well-known. Graig, Ike, Dick and Boolean had the illustrious MacBook Air, but without college degrees, barely scraped together a living as did Mrs. Fuddlebum, now devoid of a job. When the avian flu pandemic decimated the world, they had no money for any form of treatment and one after the other came to their final and ultimate demise.
What is It?
Love is a fleeting instance of mutual being. Not feeling, but being, not awareness, but being.
Love is hope.
It is the desire and hope for these moments that drive humans on their most basic level, regardless of whether or not they realize it.
The fuel that drives the human soul, for once tasted, a person is bound to it.
No human is exempt from the desire for it, though many convince themselves they are.
Beauty
Beauty is perception,
Interpretation of frequencies of light,
Slamming into the rods and cones within the eye,
Racing to the brain to be encased in thought,
From light to opinion,
Formed by the personal judgments,
The prejudice of a man,
Unknown even to the conscious mind,
These define beauty,
Beauty which is perception.
Verify Existence
Verify existence,
Punch the wall until you feel the pain,
Jump up and see if you come down,
But if you feel and if you fall,
Does it really mean you exist at all?
The world around you,
The people you can see,
You perceive therefore you think,
Existence is proven thus,
But if the perception isn't real,
How do you prove existence?
Knowledge
Knowledge is more addicting than drink,
For knowledge is the substance of life,
The blood which flows through our veins,
Without it we would be nothing,
Mere husks upon the Earth,
Without it we would shrivel and die,
As surely as a plant would without water,
Throughout our human history,
The quest for knowledge,
Our saving grace,
Our sustenance,
The avenue open for escape,
Escape from apathy,
From all that society would have us believe,
All religion would have us accept as truth,
Religion is not our salvation,
Invented principles abused for power,
Ideals and morals not our own,
Force fed since birth,
Taught to observer and follow,
Like platonic cattle to the proverbial slaughter,
The slaughter of our individuality,
Why do we stand silent allowing our voices to go unheard,
Live not in religious ignorance,
That is all it is,
And the voice of a god,
What is that but the echo of our dreams?
Man
Peace enshrined the Earth,
A veil of stillness,
Nature in its course,
Symmetry in motion,
Balance at its best,
Disrupting the tranquility,
Destroying harmony,
Man came around the corner,
And then the world was doomed,
They fight and die,
Love and cry,
Then lie in the stone cold tomb.
Realization
At the beginning of this time,
Came the word and then the lie,
Broken in the face of reality,
Came crashing to a halt,
And the sacrifice,
Life for life,
Death the catalyst,
Ending the shame and strife,
Realization oh the pain of dying,
No more time now for crying,
All done dead is the sun,
Creation begins anew.
Life in a flower
The universe in motion
Creation expanding forever in motion
One standing still, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
Over the rainbow
Under the valley
Through the window
And down the dark alley
Life keeps on moving
Never behooving
No stop, all flow
Must go, can't delay
One standing silent, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
A flower in bloom
Lighting the gloom from within
Dark minds and deeds
Poor hearts that weep
Mourning for lives already gone
One standing still, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
The equation of life
Exploding atoms
Bits and pieces of stars and stratums
Of life we never will know
One standing silent, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
Dying suns and cold dead planets
Black holes obliterating matter
Novas and blasts
Darkness and laughs
All with a light shining through
One standing still, right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
Stars being born and stars being torn
Dying too young
A fate not their own
Hopeless and dashed
Helplessly rash
Now in the stone cold tomb
One standing silent right in the middle
The Ocean of life flowing by
One just observing
Rather unnerving
Silent and still as a stone
Cold to the touch
Iced to the bone
Standing mute
Forgotten by all but a few
Life in a flower
If only for an hour or two
George Bernard Shaw once said, "Lack of money is the root of all evil;" this proved very true for three high school students, Graig, Ike and Dick. These students attended Farce High School in Colombia, a small private institution which professed a high standard of education, but extracted a large monetary toll from its students. While it promised an excellent education, it often failed to deliver. In attempts to cut costs, Farce High School regularly hired teachers such as Mrs. Fuddlebum, a charming person who, coming from a technologically backwards rural area, was forced to pretend to teach due to the fact she was qualified for nothing else. Through contracts such as these, the "superior education" promised was deteriorated beyond repair, but I digress. This is the story of Graig, Ike and Dick, not the woes of Farce High School's short, bleak life.
"I need more money," said Graig looking woeful, "at this rate I'll never afford the MacBook Air." Ike stood silently in a badassical attitude that could not have been pulled-off better by anyone short of Tom Hanks.
Dick, looking thoughtful, proposed an idea, "We need a product to sell, but what?"
Their friend Boolean, who was at times a very moral person, but at others had fewer ethics than Tom Cruise in Collateral, put forth the thought that at that moment formed from the dark swirling mists of his mind. Speaking to Graig, he said, "You could always snitch some of the Gala items and sell them on E-bay." Dick, who never had many morals to begin with, was quick to second this suggestion. With Ike still standing silently looking on, Dick and Boolean managed to convince Graig of the value of this plan and the ease with which it could be pulled off. Even if caught, they would be protected by the pure badassedness of Ike's existence, argued Dick. Graig finally gave in and they set the date for that evening; with a plan ready, they departed to gather their tools.
The next day, Prince Valentino, who also happened to be the principal of Farce, discovered that over 83.241% of the items donated to the Gala, Farce High School's annual fund raising auction, had been removed. In retaliation, he changed the school dress code, making all students wear a full body length cover made of sackcloth at school. The lack of funds coming from the Gala caused a chain reaction of misfortune for Farce High School; teachers such as Mrs. Fuddlebum were laid off, tuition was raised and many students had to leave the school, including Graig, Ike, Dick and Boolean. Though they attended schools with better educational programs than Farce, they were not accepted to the colleges they applied to because the high schools from which they graduated were not well-known. Graig, Ike, Dick and Boolean had the illustrious MacBook Air, but without college degrees, barely scraped together a living as did Mrs. Fuddlebum, now devoid of a job. When the avian flu pandemic decimated the world, they had no money for any form of treatment and one after the other came to their final and ultimate demise.